The very notion sounds absurd doesn’t it? Why would anyone want to live a life full of pain and cope with the limitations it places upon our existence? Why wouldn’t everyone want to be in a state of health; after all isn’t it the natural state of the human body to find equilibrium? Why is it that some people find it quicker to heal than others?

The answer is simple. When we become invested in our pain and the story that goes with it, the harder and longer it takes to heal. Facing one’s health issues often requires us to look deeply inside of ourselves, which can sometimes uncover deep rooted pain and unhappiness. Having the willingness and self-compassion to deal with this process isn’t easy; it requires commitment and a willingness to change. That’s where many people come unstuck. Walking into the unknown and facing our fears is a terrifying concept, so we make the subconscious decision that remaining in pain is the safest option for us.

The more invested we are in our wounds the longer it takes us to heal

I would like to share with you my journey and how I found the courage to embrace my fears and find triumph over my pain.

From the age of 25 I suffered with the most crippling endometriosis that you could ever imagine and this progressively got worse the older I got. For me this meant I got a monthly dose of heavy periods, fatigue, crippling pain and projectile vomiting. I would dread the day my period came, waiting for that all too familiar feeling, which I can only liken to a chainsaw going off in my womb. I suffered with cold sweats and sleepless nights. Work was a complete struggle and I was unable to tolerate being around anyone as I felt so awful, however, no one understood this as on the surface I looked fine, but inside my quality of life was zero. I would spend the week of my period in bed feeling sorry for myself.

When I look back now, I can clearly see my body was trying to tell me that something wasn’t right. I was in the wrong relationships, the wrong job, I wasn’t looking after my body and I was suppressing my unhappiness with partying and spending.

But it somehow served me for 12 years. I made various attempts at improving my health, from medication, herbal remedies and diet to lifestyle changes, but nothing really worked for me as I was avoiding the real issue. I knew I had to do something drastic, but I was blind to knowing what that was. I felt like I was trapped inside a maze with no way out. My soul and my intuition was screaming at me to make change, but I didn’t know how to listen and so I plodded on hoping for a miracle. That was until the day came which forced me to re-evaluate my life…

I remember being at work and I got that all too familiar feeling, a sudden wave of nausea hit me, paired with excruciating pain and a feeling that I wanted to run away. But who was I running from and where would I run to? It wasn’t as if I could run from myself, right? I excused myself from work and spent two hours laying on the curb side vomiting and crying, whilst fighting back the urge to faint. I was in too much pain to drive my car and too weak to even pick myself up off the ground.

It was at that moment I made an honest and open prayer to whoever was listening. I prayed for guidance and for support in helping me change my life. I was at a point where I was so tired of being in pain that I would have done anything in that moment to have a normal life.

It was then that I met Karen Maidment, a wonderful Health Coach who began to educate me on how to put my life back in order. I learnt how a combination of my lifestyle, stress and unhappiness had depleted my hormones. Hearing this gave me hope and I began to fight for my health. I learned how to nourish my hormones through sleep, nutrition and meditation. I learned the true meaning behind self-love, I discovered that I was the most important person in my life that was worth loving. The more I learnt how to nurture myself, I naturally became my own best friend. The more in tune I became with my body, the less intense my period pain became. During my healing process I started to be honest with myself and I discovered that my job was the key driver behind my pain. I was working in a highly stressful corporate job which was completely misaligned with my true self.
I longed to help others heal and find their passions in my own coaching business, but I was comfortable, which caused me to be unwilling to take the plunge and walk into the life I always dreamed of. Although my body was screaming at me to change, I was too invested in my own security to listen. That’s when I realised just how much my pain was serving me, all the time I remained like this I could keep telling myself that I was too sick to coach people, after all who would want to be coached by a fraud?

In 2016 I began to work on my limiting beliefs, this meant sessions with a shamanic healer who helped me with the process of reclaiming control over my reality. I went to the Amazon rainforest to work with sacred plant medicines and it was during my time there, whilst drinking ayahuasca, that I got the reality check I needed. I realised that all the pain I was experiencing, that same pain that had led me to the jungle, had been created by my own fears and stubbornness to change. I realised that I had created every single painful situation in my life with my limiting belief systems. I realised in that moment that I had to change. If I didn’t listen to that new found wisdom and the messages I was being sent, then ultimately my health would never improve.

I made the decision to leave my job and work on my business. This still terrified me, but I was now motivated by what would happen if I didn’t make those changes. When eventually the time came for me to leave my job, my endometriosis had completely cleared up. My hormones were healed, my periods had normalised, leaving me full of energy! I felt free and for the first time in years, I felt alive.

Loving life in the amazon jungle

We are all blessed with an innate wisdom of knowing when things need to change. This is delivered to us in the form of intuition or a gut feeling. These intuitive hits then turn into something a little stronger. It’s at that point we may distract ourselves from feeling these with a number of things, such as TV, alcohol or food. These ignored signals then turn into aches and pains, before illness sets in and finally, full blown disease.

Here is a wonderful way of discovering where you are with any kind of pain, from emotional to physical;

•Decide you aren’t going to let go of your pain, as that is serving you right now. (And that’s ok!)
•Decide you are going to let go of your pain and learn from it. (Yippee, you have got this!)
•Decide this pain is the best thing that ever happened to you. Maybe it’s taught you something incredible about yourself and who you are as a person. (Hail to the warrior in you!)

However you choose to view your pain, you can begin to make small changes by working on the following areas;

Seek the guidance of a qualified lifestyle coach or nutritionist and you will begin to heal your physical body.

Where do you need to forgive and let go? Look at your life and see where you may be holding onto the past. Who needs forgiving, what needs letting go of, ask yourself if you are judging others (include yourself in that question).

Where can you reduce stress levels, work load and introduce more relaxation, such as meditation, tai chi or yoga? These therapies not only support a healthy body, they also support a healthy mind.

If you are feeling stuck with your thoughts or emotions, seek the guidance of a qualified EFT practitioner (Emotional Freedom Techniques), who will be able to help you chip away at any old belief systems you may be carrying.

But above all, follow your happiness. If there is something you always wanted to try but were too afraid, now is as good a time to try as any. You deserve to live a life in a fit, healthy, happy and strong body; go ahead and grab every opportunity that life throws at you.

Until next time,

Alison x